Written by Sierra Walsh
A friendly reminder that healing is not linear. If that isn’t enough, hopefully the Self Care album from Australian pop punk band Yours Truly will be finding its way to your Spotify. Generally speaking, mental health and relationships are popular topics in music. Thankfully, there is a plethora of songs for every mood from grief to partying. However, I have noticed in my listening experiences that most albums that center around overcoming obstacles and grieving create their stories in a linear way. There’s the initial hurt, the processing of anger and depression, and then healing, ending on a note that everything will be fine. Self Care takes a route that knows healing is a process and doesn’t have a specific start and end date. Instead, it becomes an embodiment of a vital part of the human experience, complete with the fun pop punk beats and a touch of summer hope.
The first ten seconds of the album will have listeners thinking the first track “Siamese Souls” is going to be a slow ballad before jumping right into a headbanger’s delight. Kicking the album off with something as intense as a split between a Twin Flame relationship gives this sense that the entirety of the Self Care journey began with losing a part of herself. The song embodies three different conversations, beginning with “complications/Blame it on myths and stories” which alludes to the many stories revolving the Twin Flame relationship. There’s a sense that she blamed the problems on the fact that most Twin Flame relationships are destined to end, despite how intense and loving they are. Like with all mythical concepts, there are tropes such as the runner/chaser and, of course, the intensity that is unlike any other relationship. Unlike soul mates, a person has only one Twin Flame and, together, they embody the Yin/Yang energy when they reach a specific level of spiritual elevation.
A second point that can be explored is the implied expectation but still lingering disappointment towards a relationship ending. After losing someone that important and a relationship that intense, the lyrics “time after time it’s what I get for/Believing in higher places” may strike a chord. This line alone punctures the fantastic stories we hear or are taught with the reality of what happens after the myths prove themselves to be true. Even if a tragedy is expected, there can be this sense that the hurt feels like too much to overcome.
The overall third conversation this track brings to light also bleeds into the second song, “Composure.” While “Siamese Souls” is very much a break up track, it centers around what the singer lost in herself more than the other person. They left, seeming to leave behind her overanalyzing her beliefs along with the old clothes and pictures she eventually throws away. The opening two tracks are two sides of the same coin, and playing them back to back sets up the rollercoaster of emotions to follow in the rest of the album. However, there’s a certain amount of closure that is felt when she recognizes “it’s over now/I’ll keep composure” and begins to channel her focus on herself.
Self Care continues on the journey of learning how to love oneself again with the first single off the album, “Together.” To paraphrase vocalist Mikaila Delgado, the third track is all about dealing with Imposter Syndrome and overcoming anxieties in regards to manifesting one’s dreams. This is the first track where the healing process focuses solely on her, and she confronts how she feels that “the colour drained from my brain” despite putting up a face. Many relate to how “It’s easy to pretend that we’re feeling okay” rather than confronting our inner demons. With the first two tracks, “Together” becomes a song that shows what can happen after someone is finished processing a lover’s absence and is left alone with their thoughts. What has to be pulled back together? Many people push those thoughts aside and search for happy distractions, however, “Together” dives into the discomfort really working on oneself and figuring out what work needs to be done to become whole again. After this happens, one can bring their dreams to reality because their determination is stronger than their anxieties.
Patience and confidence are both values needed while diving into the accomplishing one’s dreams. “Undersize” is the encouraging anthem with a touch of mystical dreaminess, encouraging listeners to “hold your virtues now/Searching for blue butterflies” while doing the work for their goals. Treading through the seemingly mundane or nitty gritty elements of what someone loves is acknowledged to be discouraging at times, however, it is just as necessary in that process as crying and being angry is in the healing process. Even if the doubt lingers, it needs to be worked through in order to reach that ivory tower. Keep in mind, you’re not fighting by yourself. The confidence comes in waves much like the discouragement. Work through it all because it’ll be worth it.
Going back to the first two songs on the album, “Half of Me” feels like the emotions that return when she’s by herself. Wondering if “is there comfort with the absence here/While I watch it circle the drain?” creeps back to the inevitable return of missing someone that once felt like a part of you. While tracks like “Vivid Dreams” and “Undersize” pulse with the energy of accomplishing lifelong dreams and excitement with a touch of anxiety, “Half of Me” is the return to the initial hurt of losing someone that you thought was going to be there during all of it. Unlike “Siamese Souls,” however, “Half of Me” holds hope in the original beliefs in the other person and the love once shared.
One process has come full circle. Self Care started with doubt in the stories and myths only to return to the hope and confidence in them. There’s a sense of acceptance that one chapter is over, but there’s hope for a new one where they are together and better than before. She acknowledges how much she misses the “half of me/miles away.” Sometimes, simply admitting that you miss someone despite becoming the best version of yourself without them triggers the most important part of healing.
This carries over into the final track, “Heartsleeve.” There’s power in admitting “truthfully, I miss you” even if the end result is feeling more numb than relieved. At the same time, the process doesn’t always end with an abundance of hope. Sometimes, there’s long periods of feeling numb. While that may sound dismal, there’s a huge difference between feeling numb and acknowledging it in order to work through it versus feeling numb and doing everything in your power to fill the inner void, if you will. The question, “Do you find yourself ashamed to come undone?” leaves a ton of room for self-reflection as well as comfort in knowing there is nothing wrong with feeling everything that is thrown your way.
Overall, Self Care is the album that 2020 needed most. While many people – including myself – view self care as bubble baths and candles, it’s really a process of acknowledging what and why we feel when going through our most intense experiences. Hell, it doesn’t even have to be a significant experience and be as simple as an “average” day, whatever that means to you. Self-care is also a process with no real beginning or end. It is a day-by-day reflection with more rollercoasters than Cedar Point. All of it is okay. Thankfully, Yours Truly perfectly embodied a part of the process with their album, being another voice to aid people in becoming their best selves and giving a physical reminder that healing isn’t linear.
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